Friday, December 2, 2022

Cancer Therapy ๐Ÿ’Š Recordings Podcast by iServalan at Tale Teller Club

 




hello gorgeous people of the internet welcome to Friday do you know what I don't think I've done a podcast all week and possibly a bit longer I can't remember when the last one was now I've thrown myself into music production and I was working on a piece and it was so bad that it took me much longer than anticipated and I it gave me IBS what was wrong with it was because I couldn't get the vocal right because I'm not a singer I'm a terrible singer in fact I don't it's not even so much I think about sounding awful it's about having no pleasure in doing it and this is so interesting isn't it because I'm a talker I love to talk but I hate to sing perhaps that's because you know as a child I was told it was horrible or you know maybe there's some psychological thing I mean I there was a DJ who told me that I couldn't sing and he'd never play my music but I think long before that you know from from being very very young I never ever wanted to be a singer I never even I never wanted to front a band I absolutely cannot find a minuscule amount of pleasure when I sing I don't even like the choir I joined a choir once I think to make friends way back in the day I was in my 30s and I had a bunch of kids and no friends I'd come back from Africa and it may have been I come back from London and in between I was between cities and when you're between the cities it's very very hard to create a new network of friends quite often actually when your kids are at school you you build connections there and I definitely remember doing that and it that may be how I ended up at the orchestra oh sorry at the choir but it was very very religious obviously it was a church choir I don't know what I expected but it was quite a high church and actually now I've been using choral music um early choral music very early sort of Renaissance in in my um music I love it but I don't want to sing it and the church was always cold and funny enough it was the same church that I used to go bell ringing in when I was a a kid when I was about 14 I went to a couple of quite expensive schools and I went to this day school for a bit and we we like to smoke and we would pretend to go bell ringing on a Wednesday night and we might go for sort of two minutes and then we'd go off and have a [ __ ] you know around the back of a shop a closed shop in the village and then go home armed with the knowledge that we were indeed Cutting Edge Rebels lovely times lovely times I doubt there are many people that pretended to go bell ringing so they could have a cigarette much classy I'd say that was classy but the cigarettes weren't horrible Little Things um and where you could buy them then you know we could just go into shops and buy cigarettes can you believe that I'm talking about 1960 1970 maybe 1978 or 76 maybe 1976 so so actually quite a long time ago anyway um that's enough of that so I really I made this vocal and I used my um male robot flex and he wasn't getting the bits right and I think when you have this ideal in your ear about what you want your singer to do and he doesn't do it it can be quite frustrating but of course he's only doing what I tell him and I was just getting it more and more wrong anyway I did finally finish it but it was a really paired down version of it so I haven't used the lyrics in the songs so I want to I'm I'm not going to be beaten by this and I think this is the thing with music I mean I want to release one track a day which I'm on target for I mean literally the last 12 days I've released track a day how marvelous is that it's a great way to learn I've learned masses I'm verging on Experts actually when it not when it comes to singing though but certainly with music production absolutely I'm feeling very very confident that I there isn't much I couldn't produce which and I think that's rather good isn't it that's pretty good to feel like that so it's actually contemplating you know about sort of taking on managing somebody in next year finding a singer or a band and creating them um I mean I don't know if I'll do that I'll see how I feel next year the thing with being a manager is you you you're sort of obliged to give them money or to make money and I'm trying to leave that stress behind me do you see anyway my singles are out today so I did this one track and it's called Love Boat and I do actually really like it but the I re I'd written this whole song and I envisaged a pop song but it ended up being very paired down lyrically and it's a dance track which I love it's really nice however it I don't feel it challenged me in the writing a pop song contest that I've given myself so it's back to the drawing board and I'm going to try again with this extended lyric maybe I'll do something with it you know like change the timing or something it's a problem with a dance track is you know as soon as you've got it at 140 BPM and then you have um what else did I have the drums you know and four four time it automatically immediately sort of goes into dance so then I put a jazz swing on it which I really really like so I'm gonna maybe think about or perhaps if I can't do a pop song per se perhaps I could do a kind of jazz thing I mean it would for me it would be a sort of jazz fusion it would have to be that's you know that's how I work but I really like jazz and I'm quite good at it I'm quite good at jazz piano and stuff like that so I think I might run with that over the weekend but anyway look guys tonight I'm out this afternoon sorry I'm off to the club with Mama and my work is done what time is it it's 11 35 the other track I released today is a music therapy track which my my Reigns series so how that works is I use Rife recordings which I have healing powers and I incorporate them into my cello and I lay rain sounds over the top and now sort of self-hypnosis for healing now I'm not going to tell you that they definitely work I am not going to tell you that they definitely don't work what I am going to tell you is that when you listen to drones of a certain frequency your body does respond so even if you're just using them to relax I think that's as good a promise that I can make they're definitely relaxing but you need headphones because you won't hear the vibrations properly without headphones they're dissipated throughout the room unless you've got very good Acoustics of course that would work equally well so I can only upload as one track with my distributor a track that lasts less than 10 minutes so what I suggest is that you put you download it or or buy it or well you have the thing is we're on iTunes and Spotify and Amazon we're also on on YouTube and I suggest you just Loop it and then you can just listen to it on repeat and that and then fall asleep with it you know I don't know how you'd fall asleep with headphones on I've tried that it doesn't work personally I don't like the ones you stick in your ear what do you think I I like the ones that cup you know the really soft I like those they sort of cut out the world more it feels like they do and I'll tell you what else is really good in this weather you keep your ears warm yeah how cool is that so you can sort of but the problem with these headphones and modern roads is that you really have to have your wits about you so I never I never listen whilst cycling or if I was to do that I would have one earring and the other ear out you know a lot of cycling accidents and Road accidents pedestrian accidents happen because the person the victim didn't hear anything coming fact so it's really important Euros are very important to understanding the world around you so there we go um so other news is there any other news I was pretty um struck down this week with with um kidney problems clearly caused by my extra wine that a man bought the problem with the club it's not a problem but what it is sort of this why I've got my workout done early because the problem the inverse column commas with the club is people buy your drinks it's just like the old days Darlings do you know what the club is full of quite elderly gentlemen and an elderly gentleman passed upon us and he wasn't that elderly it was about 80 and in my book that's not too elderly actually now I as I get older I think the older the um the catchment area for that word becomes so where when I was you know 18 anyone over 20 was ancient um but now that I'm 60 and proud anyone over 85.90 I will consider elderly so and mum's nearly 80 you know so anyway he was probably about 80 and he ambled along actually to talk to my mother more than myself obviously because you know he he I think he'd been married twice and he had the that look about him you know that look where he they sort of think ah he's a victim my poor mother it's very glamorous lady anyway uh we said we started talking I completely took over because he started going on about petition in India and he started coming out with these very old-fashioned racist views and I it just got my back up um he was you know promoting British colonialism and how you know I'm not even going to say what he said because I I actually can't reproduce it it was so such a narrow field of viewpoint that it's not worth I I can't because I transcribe all of these broadcasts I don't want that written in any transcription that I have anything to do with um but anyway he was he he tried and failed because I've I'm quite up on partition I also wrote a music track a dance track called petition and I feel very upset about it and you know how the how everything occurred and the horrors of the reality of you know leaving stranded um people a people who you've demanded divide up into sections you know with it with a border and with these hard borders that crossed villages um and Keith and kin were had to walk thousands and thousands of miles to get to Pakistan I mean just bloody awful anyway I knew my staff and and I didn't give him a chance really because I've when the thing is when you have a debate with somebody who appears especially this sort of generation of men they kind of appear knowledgeable they project knowledge and you know of course we all want to project knowledge that we want to project something that tells you know the people that are listening the audience that we we know our [ __ ] as it were and um you know we we always want to present our best side of course we do but there's definitely a type of man and let's hope that they've been eradicated through the evolution of humanity let's hope they're over now well this he's probably almost a lot and now I I'm saying his last generation but he's probably not actually um and he he mansplaining there we go that's what it is it's quite simply mansplaining Darlings and I hadn't asked for mansplaining but once he started to mansplain I had to woman's plane um and my poor mother was just I felt bad afterwards actually but you know the wine was flowing he was buying drinks and the wine was flowing and I'm I'm quite good humid when I'm attacking I'm not a vicious malicious uh debater but I am loud anyway we had quite a few wines probably about a bottle each I don't know it was three large ones I had no yeah that's probably about a bottle isn't it six little ones three large ones and the next day I felt absolutely fine because of course I'm on this yogurt a high protein diet which it makes my stomach sing it's a singing beautiful happy stomach but a couple of days later I was hit by um cystitis and this kidney problem and it's they put me on HRT to try and stop it but obviously the wine was stronger than the HRT so I I started to feel really shivery and I just couldn't keep warm by Monday nothing could keep me warm and you know we've got this we're trying to well calm down on the old heating front but I've had to put the heating on I mean my dream of getting through winter without putting heating on is was over by November so alas we're eight degrees I think today five degrees at night which you I realize that you may be in Alaska and uh New York gets much colder doesn't it and that you you'll laugh in the face of my pathetic shivering but for me it was just very cold so today I feel much much better in fact I felt a bit better yesterday and went to mum's for dinner that was really nice but it took a few days so I'm getting around to telling you that I'm going to try not to drink too much today because three is too much I think two is manageable but today Mum Mum's the same she's going to go on to Brandy today now I have no idea how that will fare on the innards of the Martian s but I will let you know because we we like to have a drink mum and I you know we like to we like to argue with mansplainers we like them buying us drinks so that we're armed for the arguing um and we generally like to have a good time and some time off work so new single today was called Love Boat I'm not going to play that I'll maybe do that tomorrow over the weekend I'll play some of my new singles because I've done so many and so I sort of I need to register them with my publishing people and I think they're all on YouTube now already so quite quite a lot of dance music I've released but also the therapy for cancer track which I just released just now as well so all in all very very productive Darlings and it means that I can go out and and really have some you know relaxing time I think that's important isn't it just a chance to just take five from the busyness but I tell you what I left my um my Facebook and then I I was on my phone and obviously there's a bookmark I think it's called a bookmark isn't it my my phone remembered the old Facebook and I accidentally logged in and I've had to start the deletion process again and they make it very difficult for you to leave Facebook really really hard but they give you they when you start to delete an account they give you 30 days before it's actually dead so I've just got to make sure I don't accidentally log in again because there you are and it's all up and running again which is infuriating because now it's not going to be dead until the 1st of January so but at coming off that I started another one a little one I'm going to limit myself to 20 people and it's really nice because there's no stress absolutely no stress involved at all and I love that I really love that I think when you start sharing your life publicly it can be very stressful um so what I did also my my new Facebook page I've got my AI of course for the artworks for the for the music really that's the main reason and I put in I described myself as a 60 year old woman with brown eyes and braids who loves a cat and you the the pictures it gave me back were hilarious I mean I don't think I look 60 I think I look about 70. and then I thought well this is quite nice actually it's quite nice to use that so I'm that's what I'm going to do I'm going to use these photographs as my sort of public persona because you know everything's a fake anyway and you know these are the idealized images the the mirror because my AI is a mirror of society and I thought well that's what Society expects a 60 year old woman to be of course that's built on how the AI works is it uses all the pictures it can access Through Time and filtering and face augmentations are quite new so you have to remember that as well so probably it's a stylized version from the really the culmination of 150 years of photography I'm guessing that's what it is um and I was looking at it the longer I looked I thought you know what she's quite beautiful really I mean she does look um really American a sort of as American is that the right word I think so very polished really polished but really old with a cat that doesn't really look anything like my Romeo who I'm getting on with a bit better by the way anyway look I've chatted enough and I'm going to um I'm going to go and get ready oh one more thing actually I will share with you guys I've joined an actors agency so I need to take some photographs some headshots and they don't they're headshots without filters which is like eek gosh really that's tough so I'm going to do a sort of a beautiful makeup in really good light but without filters so I'm going to put those up today um but I thought next year because next year I'm going to join the Soho House Club in Brighton and I'm going to go up to Brighton once a month to the spa have a swim go to my club and join an actor's agency and just have do some life-changing things and that's why I'm doing a song a day at the moment because I want to have in January I want to have a little bit of a rest from um you know the sort of endless uh production it's I love music so it doesn't feel like work but it is production do you see so I want to have a bit of a I want to have January off to treat myself to some sort of um just more relaxing things I think and January's so Grim anyway it's so bloody cold but I've got a fur coat faux Darlings faux fur I've got a faux fur coat and I've got a faux fur hat I thought I'm just going to go on the train when they're not on strike we've got a lot of strikes here at the moment don't blame them our government's lousy and they don't they don't pay nearly enough for our public servants and our services it's it and you know what I saw an interview recently with an American Economist and you know the Americans have got a lot uh a really good idea about economics I mean they're very business savvy and he said that there's no point not giving anybody rises in Pay salary raises Rises salary Rises because what happens is they don't have enough money to spend on the economy and the economy shrinks and I just thought why why did why it happened our government thought of that is that a really simplistic way of looking at things but you know if nobody can afford to buy anything the economy is not going to grow but I tell you what guys I watched the business programs every morning because I you know I'm a music producer so I do have a business um and I I use digital and Tech every day of my life a lot of digital and Tech and my product is global so I like to keep abreast of you know the business of things the trends and although we may be in a recession and quite a lot of Europe is in a recession the new businesses that are coming through are not they're they're finding it that they're in you know they're they're able to make a profit and some older businesses that have just adapted are also making a profit so when you start thinking about that you think right okay that means I can make a profit so the utilization I think of tech is and digitization is actually one way of making a profit profit because of course you don't you don't need staff anymore so we've I've talked before about how we're going to manage our play time in the Advent of a new life the decade where you know really we only have to work half the time do you know businesses who who are using four day weeks stay equally productive as businesses who are on five days a week and interestingly enough I only work the mornings I only produce music in the mornings and I'm I'm actually producing more than I've ever produced in my entire life so the the balance of course is difficult because we you know the Devil Makes work for Idle Hands of course it does so we're going to have to learn now as human beings especially someone like me who was brought up in an age where actually you know being an artist was a very labor intensive being a musician was very labor intensive um so I've done you know by the time I'm a hundred which I really do believe I'm going to get to because of my wonderful Rock and Roll Lifestyle or should I say despite it I would have seen almost the industrialized age what it was we had steel plants and shipbuilding and and things that were you know version burgeoning um industries from the Industrial Revolution were still here and and it's moved I've watched the movement now into the tech age the tech Generations the digitized virtual meta generation and and how that affects me as a producer not a technical producer but just a producer and of output of musical output of literature what's interesting actually is I started writing about a year or two ago because it was something I could do on my own it was something that I could apply myself to that didn't require other people and this is during lockdown but now I've discovered that I can I have a whole Orchestra you know and obviously that's I say obviously because I'm a musician primarily that's take completely taken over from the writing I actually I'm not sure I like writing anymore I'm not sure I I mean obviously I've done quite a bit and I've done well poetry and short stories but I'm not sure I want to write a novel anymore it's sort of you know that ship has sailed I'm much more interested in applying music but applying music to storytelling is something I find very exciting anyway look for such a short broadcast this went on quite a long time I told you I like to chat so it was an absolute pleasure I it's time for my lunchtime coffee and um preening preening ahead uh love from Royal Clarence Marina