Monday, January 16, 2023

 hello wonderful wonderful internet I mean very high spirits today now technically theoretically I shouldn't be feeling this Lively not anything to do with the fact that I drank lots of wonderful wine with mum on Friday at the club much more to do with the fact that I've given up all my painkillers I've been on long-term painkillers and I was still having pain you see and I was having them for a combination of sort of arthritis and um sort of just you know age-related aches and pains plus what I I think is now RSI rather than just arthritis I think what happens is when you get older because of the arthritis you feel everything ten times so what a small knock a small stub of the toe when you were 20. is so much more painful when you're 60 and I think that's what sort of happens generally and I suppose it's Nature's way of getting you to slow down a bit calm down stop going on the back of motorbikes without the crash helmets um stop you know staying up really really late and under the influence of two men too much alcohol I mean I get we mum and I went home at six we we go out for the afternoon and we go home at six because you know our bodies know that and that's six in the evening darling so it's about six in the morning I mean long gone are the days when I stayed up till six in the morning I mean I can't believe I did that ever I can't believe I wouldn't have just fallen asleep in my chair in the bar you see you see um quite often don't you men men do that sort of the old sailor alcoholic men types snoring in the corner of the pub with a row of whiskey because they they just wake up and have another that somebody's bought them um anyway I'm romanticizing at the moment over sailors because my father was a sailor but also because when I I'd had a few on Friday and I always write a song on my bicycle on the way home always the the nucleus of the song so I haven't looked at the words yet but they're all written down I have to write them down as soon as I get in I have to sing them in my head write them down before I forget them if I've forgotten the words the rhyme because so much of what I'm so much of my performance art you know the lyrics are improvised so you know they change every time I still empathize them I never really stick to the stick rigidly to the the verse and the lyric um I if I picture the idea so I was picturing this idea with this uh sailor and we were talking about death and things like that my father was a sailor and I regret deeply and I think we all do gently that the relationship with my father was less than successful and I blame him entirely I mean I'd have to we we have to blame our parents don't we um he was a man of his time and that didn't bode well you know I don't think men were particularly nice as people they didn't question their morality or or their physicality or you know their gender expectations there was none of that going on and it made them horrible people I don't think he was alone in being horrible well no no one's alone in being horrible are they I mean society makes can make horrific waves of behavior we know this now we know this with you know the metoo and in the black lives matter and all of this we know that individuals are not they don't act alone they don't act alone they they act as a wave of intellectualism or cultural mores you know it's always set inside Within a huge cultural expectation and normality we know that so therefore it's quite difficult to sort of blame individuals because we always want to blame our parents because we we blame them for all of our failings anyway I was thinking about trying to you know figure out the good the good things I guess in in older men because your father is obviously older of course he has to be older and um I'd been to the bar and I'd been talking to you know they all the old men always fall over me um I get quite flirty when I've had a few and I'm younger I'm older men flirt with the younger women they can't help themselves they've been trained to do it um and I look don't get me wrong my mum does it with younger men as well it's you know the the wonderful seduction seductive quality of Youth is it um wraps around us and takes hold of our attentions it's it's a human condition and anyway I was thinking about all these things and writing the song and then I um put together I worked with my Ai and I put together a little video and and played the soundtrack bottle of rum which is a sampled it's sampled from The Armenian Navy store oh not store goodness the Army and Navy band or some such thing anyway um so I've been thinking about it I mean that sort of mood you know um I haven't written that song yet though I've written another one called get your rocks off which I actually wrote earlier in the week I think on the Monday so I'm going to do that today because it's very quick um I'll get my my Beats Ministry um AI out and we'll put together some drum tracks and stuff um so I'm anyway back to painkillers and coming off the painkillers I do hurt quite a bit today I I won't lie and that's because I rest well I did so much um a lack of physical exercise yesterday and so much bent over the computer I mean I can't wait Darlings until the time comes when I do not have to be hunched over a computer anymore and really I should be aiming at doing that as soon as possible so I think really by the end of the year at the end of 2023 I need to have you know managers or or other people even if it's a button that you press you know AI is doing everything for us there's no reason why AI can't do all of the stuff that I do which involves being bent over a computer the difficulty is storytelling I did try and dictate to an AI it's expensive you see that's a problem Darlings it's it's very it's it's not cost effective at the moment but what when one is trying to be a writer one hopes that at some point I can be like Barbara Cartland and I can just dictate and I'll have my robot at the end of the bed doing all the typing for me or either a virtual robot you know one that I don't see one that I just spurt or or an actual robot which would be even better because he'd follow me around see I've been working with Alexa as well who's who it has proved to be rather useless except for entertaining Romeo so Romeo likes to sit on the bed when I'm not on in the four poster this warm and snuggly where I sit you see so I warm it up I mean he waits he's here waiting for me to get up so and go and do some work so that he can sit on the warm bit where my bum's been and then I'll pop on some um something you know some Vaughn Williams it's listening to Vaughn Williams I mean he loves Romeo loves former Williams it's taken over from Bach I think I it's got such good taste my cat what superb tasty has um anyway I was thinking about I was listening to Vaughn Williams and thinking about the Skylark thinking about the birds the albatross you know the more seafaring sort of birds was all working with the lyric of this um rather dramatic song about dead Souls I would totally captivated by the the the strength of the sea in the ocean and it's going to come up many many times and of course immersion my book at the moment is the story is about being under the sea so it's a sort of um you know cathartic processing my father was of the sea all these things so they're all sort of coming to her head now and it's very very exciting very exciting anyway the painkillers I'm off the painkillers and I feel very I feel a little bit uncomfortable today but it's because I didn't plank yesterday so very soon I'm going to go and plank for 60 Summers which is my YouTube show so let's talk about that so I oh there's Romeo over the microphone as usual um so the YouTube channel I reinstated because I'd taken it all down because I couldn't decide on my direction and it's really important when you're going to launch yourself into the stratosphere as a a bra designer and an exciting tattoo artist and all these you know plans that I've got for 2023. it's really important to have faith in your brand and I've been grappling with the brand for so long because it seemed to be it was only when I got my boobs out that I the brand was getting any traction and I I'm I'm loathe to get them out so I've bought these latex boobs there is a bit of a problem I put the latex boobs onto the um the model that I had previously who's already got breasts so the boobs on top of the breasts of the um Taylor's dummy are far too big so today I'm going to be sewing the breasts off of my polystyrene model I mean it's such a drama and then putting the now I bought you can buy different flesh tones for the for the um the latex resumes and I went for um a Fame color

um I I nearly sort of just bought white one you know really pale because I'm really pale and then I thought why am I doing that why am I doing that I mean ultimately when I can afford it I'll buy all the colors of the rainbow so that I and I'll all the sizes as well but at the moment I mean they're quite big they take up a lot of room but um you know it'd be lovely to have a you know a proper properly dark um African pair um to model my bras with of course you know so I'll be doing that soon so I went for the sort of I suppose you know a quite a bit darker than me then I was thinking I could wear it to do my keep fitting because my keep fit with my big boobs was really really popular and I thought well can my I can flatten mine now you know they're they're getting on a bit and I thought well is that the right color but when I faked tan I think it probably is about the right color as long as I wear in a fake tan anyway I'm probably going to be doing that this week so I'll be like a drag queen doing keep fit and when you're a character because I've had all these characters in my life the Countess of bread and acne was my most famous character and and then the dominant artist was quite famous as well and when you're in character it allows you to have a lot of public attention without having any public attention whatsoever so that that's kind of where I'm at at the moment I'm thinking well I might as well dress up and for my keep fit but not for my blanket with my blanketing I've just got my GoPro on and and you can just come with me to Planks I'm going to plank in a minute um so did join me for that so that's on 60 Summers so I can see that I I'm getting more views at 60 Summers there's a 22nd 22 second video on there that has had 77 000 hits views and I I have no idea why I literally have no idea why it's called walkies with Pasha and I will never understand the the market I never understand my audience I will never understand what accidental um flick of the hair or Flex of a a breast it's I never understand what makes and I guess I do I partly it's because the more it gets washed watched the more it gets watched do you certain minutes the trajectory isn't it because this is what the internet does if you if somebody's appears to be popular then they're going to throw it down everyone's throats I mean that's why I hate the internet actually because I'm not looking for that but the internet is a feeder and the public is a fat a stuffed turkey lying there with its mouth open saying feed me feed me that's the nature of the Beast isn't it um so anyway I'm trying to get into it I am trying to get into it um I haven't slept for about three days because now that I'm not taking these painkillers used to knock me out as well so they they were twofold they put me to sleep eventually and I'd be comatose comatose for about six hours and it was very nice to have those sleeps but you're not you're not actually waking up very refreshed at all and I'm pretty sure it wasn't very healthy and the headaches had started to come back so coming coming off them has meant that I've I'm not going to bed now till about five in the morning I'm sure I'm sure that I need to set an alarm or something and I suppose the Alexa will be you know quite good for that to get me up in the morning um so I'm probably going to have to do that as part of my new sleep hygiene regime and because I want to film every morning I want to do my I want to do my plank in Basking in the sunshine at the marina as it floods through the music room um filled with the joys of spring that's what I want to do and you know what we've got a bit of sun today so I'm quite looking forward to that um so there we go I think that's that's enough for today isn't it I've I've covered the breasts which I want to talk about and I've covered my new show 60 Summers so just you know pop along and have a bit of a laugh with me I've done it there's been a lot of DIY stuff on there because uh you know it 60 Summers really is a diary about you know my aunties want to get up to each day and it seems that people are interested in grammar antics it seems that I I'm able now to come out as a grandma I'm able to say to the world I'm old and you can share my dreams with me but my dreams are valid and they resonate with people even if it's just coming for a little walkie it's with my 77 000 Hits video I'll I'll put the link up um somewhere or just Google just Google 60 Summers that's the best thing to do isn't it so I'm going to go and write my rocks Off song and do some planking and maybe I'll actually I'll tell you what I could do I could play it for you later on a midnight a Midnight Hour broadcast shall I do that I'll do that um well have a wonderful Sunday I have lunch with mum well it's not lunch at supper with uh Sunday supper didn't sound as good as Sunday lunch does it with mum later on oh I did want to tell you about mum's dancing I'm not sure if I mentioned it the other day the power of the

the mind to affect um pain upon us because they told mum she needed a new hip so she went to one doctor and said no no you know they're all scratching their heads in a new hip new hip new hip just because of her age really I don't think anybody actually studied the the photographs that you know the x-rays then she went to a physio finally they after you know two years of the Grave discomfort but being told that she needed a new hip she bought a walking stick she was limping to the bar but at least she was headed to the bar but she was limping anyway she went to see this Physio and he said no no you don't need a new hip we're first we're first stage rotting hip and what do they call it you know when it when your bones start crumbling and all that um I I can't remember the word for it but it it's got a term and it it comes with age but she's only first grade so it's not bone on bone yet it's not even bone on bone so she put somebody put Tina Turner on the jukebox at the bar and she danced like proper danced like boogie down down and she hasn't moved like that really for about two years because she's been expecting to have this hip so the power of being told that you don't need a new hip to to convince or to take away the expectation and therefore the pain and and to energize one there's a miracle it's like a miracle cure and I suppose that's what they do isn't it on these you know when they have these healers and they have this wailing in church and and the the pastor Pastor puts his hand on the the congregation heads and just says you are healed like that and the power of that you can see it then and they you know they're they're peeled they can see or they can walk or but I think it only lasts a couple of minutes but that's the power of the Mind Over our own personal discomfort and pain and so I'm thinking about that this week and I'm thinking no I'm I'm off my medication and I certainly don't need anything replaced honestly I don't

um maybe my soul so anyway um I think that's covered everything for now anyway Darlings so have a beautiful over 60 day whatever you're doing wherever you are and may there be peace in your Valley and may your hips work fine and I'll be back soon